


Rain

by Demibel



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Blow it up and take yourself with it, Gen, Major angst warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-22
Updated: 2013-04-22
Packaged: 2017-12-09 05:04:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/770282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demibel/pseuds/Demibel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s raining, and it’s dark, and there’s a great deal of shouting and then the soldiers advance. There’s shooting and fire and the bang bang bang of the guns in the schoolboys’ hands. The gunmetal is cold and slippery in Marius’s hands, and he throws it aside.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rain

It’s raining.

It’s raining, and it’s dark, and there’s a great deal of shouting and then the soldiers advance. There’s shooting and fire and the _bang bang bang_ of the guns in the schoolboys’ hands. The gunmetal is cold and slippery in Marius’s hands, and he throws it aside. There’s a torch within arms distance, and every nerve ending in his body is telling him _pick it up do it you have no choice._

It’s raining as they cry out to fall back, the guardsmen are climbing over the barricade. What most of the men in uniform cannot see is the boy with the torch, and the boy following him. The guard who notices the torch bearer aims at him, and the young boy in the hat pulls the gun to his breast. The shot is muffled by his clothes and he crumples to nestle between the woodwork of the barricade.

It’s raining and they’ve already lost people. The girl, masquerading as a boy, groans in pain as Marius steps over him, holding a barrel of ammunition and his torch. It’s the last thing she sees, and as far as last sights go, she reckons the man she loves being brave isn’t a bad last memory at all.

“Blow it up and take yourself with it!”

“And myself with it.”

It’s raining, and the guardsman and the schoolboy are having a stare-off, like young children might on nights when they are bored and need to find some way to have a contest. But this is one staring contest that will not end in giggles and funny faces. The schoolboys retreat, only Enjolras attempting to move forward. He can see the flicker of hopelessness in Marius’s eyes. The younger man believes he has nothing left to live for with his lady love gone. And if there’s nothing left to lose, then what does it matter if he brings the flame of his torch a bit closer to the barrel.

It’s raining and the guardsman is standing his ground. He’s afraid. But he’s not going to back down, nor will he give the order for the others to back away. Maybe it’s because he truly does not wish to cause more death. Maybe it’s better this way, to let the pieces fall where they may. Because if things were different, he would be the one holding the torch on the other side of the barricade. He doesn’t want to fight anymore. He doesn’t want to kill the boys he sees his own face in.

It’s raining, and Marius has nothing else to live for. Cosette is gone, across the sea, and there is no guarantee she’ll even remember him if he survives. He’s made the choice to come back, to fight and die with his brothers. But he saw their fear, and their will to live, and their untimely deaths. Eponine is gone, the dear, sweet friend who has given him so much. He looks over his shoulder for the briefest of moments. There is Enjolras, looking frightened for the first time Marius can ever recall, inching slowly slowly slowly towards the barricade with an arm outstretched. Perhaps to take the torch away. There is Combeferre, ever calm and collected, though he holds tight to an injured comrade, panic at the edge of his eyes. There is Joly and Feuilly and Jehan and Bossuet. He cannot see Bahorel or Grantaire, but he knows they were there. And finally, there is Courfeyrac. His most trusted ally, and greatest, most intimate friend. “I have come to sleep with you.” And he just answered with a nod and a warm bed. If there is one he wants to save from this fate most, it is Courfeyrac. The law student is frightened, and he isn’t looking at Marius. He’s trying to keep a hold on Gavroche, who has just witnessed his sister die at the barricade. _She was never supposed to be here, Eponine what have you done?_

It’s raining, and Marius wishes to just once to see Courfeyrac’s face once more. If he cannot see Cosette, then please, please dear God let him see Courfeyrac. And, as if God were pulling the strings of His marionette puppets, Courfeyrac looks up to see his best friend, the flame of his torch illuminating a serene smile. Marius feels content, even if his friend’s expression is one of pure terror as he gently taps the end of his torch to the fuse of the barrel.

It’s raining, but instead of water droplets, there is ash and flame and bits of wood and blood after the explosion. Everything is a flurry of motion and muffled sound and panic. The guardsmen fall back in the absence of their leader, their losses too great to press on. The schoolboys slowly filter into the café to count their losses and tend to their wounded. Many of them cannot hear anything but a steady ringing, their ears damaged by the boom of their barricade being blown sky high. Enjolras has a severely broken arm, from when he was reaching out for Marius and his torch. Gavroche lays curled up in a corner, cradling himself and mourning the latest loss of a childlike innocence he never had. Joly and Bossuet sit together, bandaging each other’s wounds and murmuring to one another about seeing someone named Chetta. Grantaire is sitting in the corner, hand wrapped around a bottle of brandy with a look of guilt on his face that threatens to remain permanent. Feuilly comforts Jehan, though they both look as if they could not stand without the support of Combeferre’s hands at the small of their back, as he murmurs to both of them. Courfeyrac is nowhere to be found.

It’s no longer raining, and Courfeyrac refuses to leave what’s left of the barricade. He’s got to find Marius. He’s just got to. That man is his best friend, and he’s made the unspoken vow to protect him. He’s got to find Marius, he’s just got to. But it’s so hard to see. The doctors will tell him later that his head injury caused him his blindness. He can’t hear yet either, so he doesn’t know if his calls for the boy are being answered. He calls until his throat is hoarse and he can’t speak any longer. When Enjolras comes out to find him huddled against a wall, the chief wraps his uninjured arm around the center, and they mourn together for a short time. There will be no victory celebration, not tonight. Their loss is far too great to even think of what Marius’s sacrifice has brought them.

It’s no longer raining, and Courfeyrac has to tell Cosette that her love died with her name on his lips and love in his heart. He watches as this lovely blonde angel crumples and the light of her eyes extinguishes. He watches as her world becomes that much darker and smaller, and he can only hold her hands, because he knows what she is feeling.

It hasn’t rained in days, and Courfeyrac meets Marius’s grandfather at his funeral. He’s never hated a man so much in his life then when Monsieur Gillenormand shakes his hand and asks him how he knew his grandson. Jehan has to take his hand and lead him away from the service, out of fear that he would lash out at the older gentleman. _You pushed him away he came to me when you denied him you didn’t love him like his friends did you have no right._

It’s raining, and France has one man to thank for her freedom. Only a few know his name. His grave holds a coffin with no body, and his friends visit it every Sunday with flowers. Sometimes a young woman joins them, but she cannot stand to be there for too long. She can’t bear to stand there and remember the future that he gave up, the one they could have had together, so that the future now belonged to their country. Marius Pontmercy.

It was raining when he died, so that they all may live.

_Vive la France!_

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to explore the AU in which Marius does blow up the barricade, and the amis are victorious because of his sacrifice. There's far too much Marius hate in the world, and I just wanted to explore what would have been if he was seen as a fallen hero instead of the sad sole survivor. This may be updated as more headcanons develop.


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